1110 – Finally Bored

441 Cdo/220 lbs/97 Core

All of my quiet time has finally brought me to where I need to be. Bored. Ready to get things done.

Or, we’ll see. I’m terribly unreliable when it comes to doing things for myself. On the other hand, I see the life I want. And I won’t be able to live, sitting on my ass.

1109 – Last Winds of August

441 Cdo/220 lbs/97 Core

I love this part of summer,as it ebbs away. The winds pick up so that the trees are always in motion, the leaves rustling. There’s a stretch of road I hit on the way home that is bordered by tall reeds and grasses, the sound of the wind just now is spectacular.

I feel better, brighter. More hopeful about setting goals and accomplishing them. I finally had to quiet my mind and put in some time thinking about the kind of person I want to be, how do I want what’s inside to be reflected outside. How do I want to look? What do I want to spend time doing?

1107 – Sharing the Crown

441 Cdo/222 lbs/97 Core

Kim did it! She talked her way on to Team Europe! Soooo excited. We get along really well; I can learn a lot from her; and she respects my work. We are going to kick some ass! She used to be on Team Africa, so our little corner of the department is so, so happy.

Laundry night, finally. Don’t know why it’s become such a road block for me. And it’s an expensive road block. Stains get set in. There’s a woman in the department who I do not like, but she dresses well. As I was coming down to the last available pieces of clothing, I finally could see that my “wardrobe” also reflects chaos and lack of planning. I own very few pieces that I really like, let alone love. Part of the problem is fat lady clothing, but it’s also because I have very rarely shopped with a purpose. No wonder I’m so unhappy with myself, I dress the opposite of how I picture myself in my mind.

Maybe I should go on a diet and go to the gym. Keep a food diary. Save for buying a better quality, cohesive wardrobe. Maybe, I should really edit what I have and come up with a wardrobe that in some way reflects who I am.

Who am I?
better qu